Rhonda Rabow’s Newsletter
Deciding about your relationship
Should I stay or should I leave?
Maybe you are feeling frustrated or disappointed right now. Maybe you are just in a rut or your relationship just doesn’t feel the same. How do you know when there is no hope to fix it, or when it is just like any normal relationship, having some bumps along the way.
Asking yourself these questions might help let you know if it’s time to consider leaving, or if there is still enough love left to continue working on it. If you still can’t decide or don’t have the tools to “fix it”, it may be time to seek some objective, professional help.
1. Were things between you every actually very, very good?
2. Do you argue more or less, when you have more time together?
3. Are you afraid of your partner? Does s/he have the potential to become violent?
4. Despite your problems, are there activities that you both anticipate with pleasure that not only make you feel good but also feel close?
5. Do you really LIKE your partner? Is s/he a basically nice person?
6. Does your partner treat you with respect?
7. Does your partner make you feel humiliated or invisible?
8. Does your partner shut down when you want to talk?
9. Is it hard to tell when your partner is telling the truth?
10. Do you often feel that it’s not safe to share your feelings with your partner?
11. Have either of you stopped any kind of physical contact, e.g. touching?
12. Do you disagree about sex?
13. In times of crisis, do you and your partner pull together or apart?
14. If you could go back in time, would you still pick the same partner?
15. If you won the loto, would you fantasize about sharing it with your partner or wish it was all yours to keep?
16. Is your partner willing to accept his or her share of the responsibility regarding the couple problems, or is it always your fault?
17. Do you currently share goals and dreams for your future life together?
18. Is s/he there for you when you need him or her?
19. When is the last time you had fun together?
20. Have you given up hope that things could ever get better?
Recommended books and Readings -
From Panic to Power by Lucinda Bassett
Healing Grief by James Van Praagh
Worry?
Where are you on the Worry Scale? Find out and then decide if you are ready to change that.
See
www.HelpHelpMeRhonda.ca and look under “Articles”.
Guest Rhonda discussing Anxiety on CJAD radio,
 Click [HERE] to Listen
Best wishes for all.
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