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Rhonda Rabow’s Reviews
More Rhonda Rabow Reviews for Discover the 3 Secrets to Living Happily Ever After...
From Laurel Johnson, Senior Review Editor for Midwest Book Review and Dandelion Books Author:
Almost 50% of marriages in North America fail. Rhonda Rabow believes such failures are unnecessary and she has the credentials and experience to back it up.
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For decades, she has practiced as a Counseling Psychologist, a Family Life Educator, and Relationship Therapist.
As she worked one-on-one with troubled marriage partners, Ms. Rabow developed a treatment plan that delivers long term results in a short term time period.
This book is the culmination of more than 25 years of experience as a marriage counselor.
The premise of her counseling plan is simple and straightforward, based on 3 secrets:
Focus on your partner’s strengths.
Learn to listen and communicate.
Deal with the problem and then let it go.
Rabow understands that these three steps can be difficult at first. Marital infidelity, for example, breaks hearts and wounds spirits.
Ridicule can be equally wounding.
In her book, she provides examples of how to apply the secrets to specific issues and of real couples who overcame difficult obstacles by systematically applying the three secrets.
The author also takes readers through the five steps of a successful marriage. No matter what the struggle, a state of happiness and contentment can be reached by communicating and cooperating throughout these five steps:
Infatuation
Disillusionment
Power struggle
Acceptance, forgiveness, letting go
Happily ever after
Some couples manage to work their way through problems on their own. Most give up in despair, resulting in divorce.
Rhonda Rabow has provided simple, helpful, sensible guidelines here for troubled couples. Her book should be required reading for every couple planning marriage. Highly recommended.
Rhonda Rabow, credentialed in counseling psychology, psychology, and Imago relationship therapy, expresses her awareness of the needs of partners within a marriage through an understandable framework of actively cognizant behavior in her very readable Discover the 3 Secrets to Living Happily Ever After.
Using short stories of couples and exercises to follow, one readily finds himself mirrored in the struggle to comprehend the disillusion, disappointment, pain, and estrangement found in ailing unions.
Today finds many who consider the bonds of marriage as disposable as most other segments and items of our culture.
However, you take yourself with you wherever you go and Rabow reminds us that challenges are part of the human experience. When we believe a spouse has abandoned or rejected us, we feel emotionally starved, deserted, and alone With her guidance, the invested reader can change the “you” or “me” in scenarios to “we” as the marriage evolves.
This short and concisely written work supplies a guideline in three “secrets” for self-awareness and highlighted compassion to acknowledge that each spouse must feel accepted, heard, safe, understood, respected, and loved.
Marriages that house dissatisfied partners need a stimulus of observation, accountability, and self-discipline. Stages exist in unions and the key to communication means more than speaking openly and clearly stating needs.
We must learn to convey our ideas without criticism and in terms the other may best grasp depending on his particular “wiring.” Mrs. Rabow explains that “some experts believe we are drawn to the person most like the parent with whom we had the most challenges.” To create the desired result in sharing ideas and ourselves, we learn to be conscious of our methods, observe patterned behaviors and unrealistic expectations, and to be in touch with the collision of childhood nonfulfillment of anticipation crashing into today's arguments, hurts, and upsets.
Sometimes all we need to express is that “I see you are really upset, but I don't know what to do.”
The clarity of Rhonda Rabow's three secrets offers hope for any relationship: focus on the strengths of your partner, learn to be an effective communicator and listener, and deal with the problem to then let it go with forgiveness. This release of resentment is not just for your partner, but necessary for us all to go forward by opening the heart to trust again. Happiness finds a foothold when we can accept our inner wounds while working to achieve actual resolution to problems.
The last section of this optimistic work deals with specific relationship issues and steps toward solving problems. “The success of a relationship does not depend on matched backgrounds, educational levels or financial circumstances. Rather, it depends on a choice we make to learn to understand and appreciate each other and be accepting of differences.”
--Becky Reed, Author
Best wishes for all.
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